More than ever we are seeing non-traditional weddings that are being officiated by a close relative, a family friend, or even an old college roommate who got ordained online to marry the couple!… It is so very special and sentimental to have the opportunity to say “my best friend Joe married us”. Why are we bringing this topic this to your attention, you ask? Because many of those who get ordained online spend all of their time researching vows and marriage licenses, and they forget to gather the other important details to prepare for –everything from the processional to the recessional. So, here we go… We are sharing with you a traditional wedding order so that your ceremony rehearsal runs smoothly and your ceremony even smoother!
– Seating of the Guests –
Have your ushers start escorting guests up to 30 to 45 minutes before the ceremony begins. Ushers should assign seats as the guests arrive, from the front rows to the back, with the exception of reserved seating for parents and any other special guests. Traditionally the bride’s guests will be seated to the left and the groom’s guests will be seated to the right; however, many times we are hearing “pick a seat not a side!”
– Processional –
First things first… women should always stand to the left of the men. Need help remembering this?… Lucy’s to the left and Ralph’s to the right. (silly, we know!)
Mother of the Bride – The mother of the bride’s entrance marks the beginning of the ceremony and processional.
Groomsmen – The groomsmen can either walk down the aisle one by one (the best man should go last), or arm-in-arm with the bridesmaids (which the women often times prefer so they don’t have to walk solo!)
The Best Man – The best man walks down the aisle after the groomsmen and stands at the groom’s side during the ceremony. He may also hold the bride’s ring (or both rings).
The Groom – Traditionally, the groom will enter next, walking down the aisle solo. However, many couples choose to have the groom’s parents escort him down the aisle. Or, another alternative would be for the groom to enter the ceremony from the side of the venue, followed by his best man and groomsmen (which happens often at The Pavilion– where the groom will walk in with the officiant. All personal preference!)
The Officiant – A very important part of the ceremony, the officiant is usually honored with a spot in the processional. Alternatively, he could enter from the side of the venue with the groom, as we’ve mentioned above.
The Bridesmaids – The bridesmaids walk down the aisle before the maid or matron of honor, all in the order of which the bride chooses.
The Maid or Matron of Honor – The maid or matron of honor assists the bride with her dress, veil, and train, making sure everything looks perfect before she walks down the aisle. She then stands by the bride’s side at the altar and holds her bouquet and sometimes the groom’s ring.
The Flower Girl & Ring Bearer – Traditionally, the ring bearer carries the wedding rings (or decoys, if he’s too little to be trusted with the real deals) and the flower girl may carry a basket of flower petals, which she scatters as she walks down the aisle. After the procession is over and the rings are handed off to the best man, the children’s work is done, and they can be seated with their parents.
The Bride and Her Father – You guessed it, here comes the bride! The bride’s father traditionally escorts his daughter down the aisle, standing to her right. After he “gives her away” to the groom, he lifts her veil and kisses her, signifying his blessing, then takes his seat beside the bride’s mother.
– The Ceremony –
Officiants opening remarks – “Dearly beloved, we are gathered here today…”
The charge to the couple – This is set aside to address the significance of the vows about to be taken.
The Exchange of Vows – Promises to each other. We are finding a lot of couples write their own vows and have the officiant read them off.
The Ring Exchange – “With this ring I thee wed”
The Pronouncement of Marriage – Making it official (and one step closer to the kiss!) “I now pronounce you husband and wife”
THE KISS
Closing remarks – These are easily forgotten by many officiants — it is a time to say a final blessing and give announcements such as “please join us for cocktail hour on the patio of The Pavilion”…. It will assist with the direction of what your guests take next.
– Recessional –
This is simply the reversal of the processional, you exit the ceremony together as husband and wife, followed by the wedding party!
And they lived happily ever after…
